Is My Baby’s Development Normal? Understanding Milestones & Red Flags: Part 1 Ep 113

The 4 Building Blocks of Speech Development – Part 1

Long before your toddler says their first real word, two powerful foundations (milestones) must already be in place: interaction and understanding.

These aren’t “nice to have” skills — they are non-negotiable building blocks for speech, language, connection, and future learning. 

Yet so many parents are told to wait and see, when in fact, there’s so much YOU can do now.

In this episode, Erin shares:

• The first two building blocks of speech development
• Why interaction (shared attention) is the starting line
• How understanding language comes before using it
• How development is dynamic (not linear!)
• The red flags parents often miss
• What to change at home right now if you’re noticing signs of delay (or just want to keep him on track)
• And how to recognize real progress — even before words appear

You’ll leave feeling more empowered, more aware, and ready to take action — not out of fear, but from a place of clarity and confidence.

❤️ Ready for personal, purposeful progress?
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Momentum begins the moment you say yes.

CLICK HERE NOW - Tiny Challenge for Moms 

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CONNECT WITH ERIN
contact@HyerLearning.com

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Podcast Disclaimer:
This podcast is for educational purposes only and is not a substitute for medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Always consult your pediatrician or a qualified health provider with questions about your child’s development or health. The views shared are based on Erin Hyer’s professional experience and are intended to support informed parenting, not to replace individual consultation or care. Every child and family is unique—please use your discretion and consult trusted professionals when making decisions for your child.

Transcript

Erin: 0:00

You must be more interesting than anything else in the room. The toys, the widgets, the mirror, anything, your face, your voice, your eyes, your mouth, your body language, your silliness, they need to be intrigued with this adult figure. Mom, dad, grandparents, primary caretaker. Human communication isn't only about words. It starts way before talking with the nonverbal communications, facial gestures, expressions, pitch tone. Body language. Then Hello and welcome to Talking Toddlers where I share more than just tips and tricks on how to reduce tantrums or build your toddler's vocabulary. We're gonna cover all of that, but here our goal is to develop clarity because in this modern world, it's truly overwhelming. This podcast is about empowering moms to know the difference between fact and fiction, to never give up, to tap into everyday activities, so your child stays on track. He's not falling behind, he's thriving. Through your guidance, we know that true learning starts at home. So let's get started. Today we're diving into part one of a powerful two part series that breaks down something. Every parent should understand the four foundational pillars that support healthy speech and language. speech is the physical part of talking. It's moving all the muscles in our mouth to make the sounds and then putting those sounds together to make the words and string those words together to make sentences. That's the language portion. But these four pillars aren't just about talking. They reflect how your child connects, thinks. Plays, responds, and ultimately how he or she communicates with the world. So welcome back to Talking Toddlers. I'm Erin, your host, and I'm really glad you're here. Let's zoom out for one quick second. Human communication isn't only about words. It starts way before talking with the nonverbal communications, facial gestures, expressions, pitch tone. Body language. Then over time, that grows into the verbal communication. The sounds, single words, short phrases, and eventually conversations. But here's the thing, communication doesn't just happen because your kids are exposed to other people talking. It happens because they actively engage in this developmental process. They must interact. Understand. Then respond, and then eventually begin to express themselves in a variety of ways that demonstrates their understanding. So today in this episode, I'm going to walk through pillar number one. And pillar number two with real life examples. Then we will highlight some red flags that you can watch out for. Then I'll bring it home and we will share specific things that you can do today, no matter where they are on this continuum. If you're seeing some of those red flags, if he's right where he needs to be or if he hasn't started yet. I will walk you through some things that you can do today. And don't worry, we will cover pillars three and four in the next episode. I don't wanna ever overload you, and I know sometimes I get stuck in the minutia. I really just wanna empower you and give you both the building blocks and the why behind it. So let's start in the beginning. All communication really begins with connection and interaction between two people. That's why social engagement is the foundation to speech and language. And a lot of times parents will get hung up when they're working with a speech pathologist and say, you're just playing with my kid, We have to use that, the play-based skills to then tap into attention and focus, engagement and speech and language. So from birth, your baby is wired to connect. He listens for your voice, he locks your eyes he knows you're the most important person in his world. He responds emotionally even before he has words. And those early cries, they tell a lot. You know that, and I know that. And as soon as you can begin to differentiate them, wow. Communication really starts to take place. But before your child can really start to talk, they first have to follow along these items first, pay attention to others, then listen with intention. Initiate contact, such as squealing or cooling, or reaching, or those infamous cries, right? Some cries are, I just need love. Some cries are, oh my gosh, I'm all wet and yucky, and I don't like this feeling. Please, please, please rescue me. But most importantly, at this stage, your child needs to enjoy the shared moments, engage. Uh, together and feel connected. So let me say this clearly because I think this is a big piece of the puzzle that's being missed or overlooked, or just pushed aside. Social interaction is not just about smiling and eye contact. It's about feeling connected. And I can tell when I pick up a baby, and even though I'm a new face, I'm a new voice. They're connected to me because of the novelty, mostly in the very beginning. And then hopefully I am giving them that vibration. Like I'm a good person, you can trust me, but it's really feeling connected. So a lot of kids will look at at people and make eye contact, but the connection isn't very deep. So what you want to see in your baby, in your early toddler or infant, that your baby is watching other people's faces with curiosity and they're smiling and laughing in response to your voice and me connecting with a strange baby. I can make them smile. I can make them coup and babble. Because one, that's just what I do, but two, they're connected because they feel safe enough and they've had enough life experience, even if it's just been for a few months. They know what a good, solid, safe voice and facial expressions. And then you want your baby babbling by 6, 7, 8 months. Those are the critical movements where they're mo moving from crying and cooing. Cooing is just primarily vowel sounds and now you want them to start more confident like sounds right, and putting different sounds together and really playing with it. And like I say here, a lot. You want noisy babies, you want noisy toddlers. We want kids practicing their voice hearing themself, and there's been a number of studies over the years that 50% of what a typical average toddler hears all day, every day is his own voice. And that's how he's getting that auditory feedback, and he's playing with that in real time. So as they continue to grow, your baby then moves into toddler. A toddler just means that they're mobile, right? And you want to see your toddler include you and other people whom he trusts in those activities, you want them to show you things. Often, and that's the key that you want them pretty much under your feet. Yes. It drives you crazy. But you're also, he's also, his behavior is also telling you, I'm connected with you, mom. You're interesting. I wanna be with you. I wanna learn. So they want to. Always be getting your attention and sharing whatever you're doing, whatever they're doing, so that share eye, eye gaze, and facial expressions are all meaningful to him, and he is playing along in real time with you. If you're seeing all of those things, you're in a very good place. If your child social skills seem to be unfolding, they're connecting, they're interested, they're always under your feet, they're always wanting to be a part of it. Then that first layer, those building blocks seem to be good, So now let's take a look at some red flags. And these are signs that may indicate something could be a little off. And we're again, first looking at what. Interconnection, or I'm sorry, interaction, you know, nonverbal communica, nonverbal communication skills look like. Right. So the first thing is always, we always, a lot of people misunderstand this, but it's inconsistent or poor eye contact with intent. Right with connection. It's not just that they're ignoring you. Sometimes kids will not look at you and listen to you because perhaps they're sensory sensitive and the visual and the auditory is too much of a load. So they'll listen to you but not look at you at the same time, and that's hard to determine unless someone points it out to you. But you just want to take a. An assessment, a, a collection of information, and look at what are their different eye contacts with different people over several days. you also want them to be able to look at you, get your eye gaze as a way to get your attention If your child isn't using that eye gaze to get your attention, like sometimes they'll get into something, they'll look over at you and like, uh, is this okay mom? Or, look what I'm doing, mom, isn't this wonderful? You want that intermittent eye gaze seeking attention, reinforcement or redirection, If they're not doing that, that's a little red flag. If your child doesn't respond to their name by 12 months and typically. And I've shared this with families just recently, a number of times, give them three times if, especially if they're playing with a train set or if they're, you know, engrossed in Play-Doh or whatever they're engrossed in and you call their name. You know, Joey. And they, they're, you know, that's real focused time. They might not be able to switch gears and shift gears and turn their attention to your voice. So wait a second, then give his, give him a second try and a third try. Notice what he's doing in the moment. How far? Away are you? But it's important that they really, by that first birth, they really understand that phrase or that term right there, that's me. And they should respond to it, especially if it's coming from mom, dad, or their primary caretaker. Right. The other thing to look at that could be concern is that they ignore people, but they're highly interested in screens for one thing, or toys and or objects, right? Or they're, they're investigating the room, but they're really not looking at the people, you know, whether they're. New people or familiar people that they're more interested in objects and less interested in getting to know you. The other thing that could be a red flag is that they don't share smiles and they don't share. Expressions or sounds like if you coup, do they coup back? If you make a funny animal sound, will they try to imitate you? That imitation or that early stage of of turn taking is pretty important to measure their interaction. You also want to look at, Do they really know how to ask for help? Do they know how to seek someone appropriately? Sometimes it might be interrupting and, and that like, Hey, mommy, mommy, mommy, I need help. But are they really, truly seeking your guidance to help them in whatever the tasks they're struggling with? And the other thing is there, there's an emotional disconnection. And so a lot of kids will be affectionate and they've learned how to cuddle or hug, but it's still not very deep. it's a quick. Yes, I'll give you a hug or, yes, I'll give you attention because you ask for it and because I do love you. I just don't know how to engage with you. So the key here and, and as we walk through these four pillars, I want you to understand that if you have several of these signs, these red flags. It might not just be, oh, he's a late talker. It might be pointing to more social communication issues. And so I, I will recommend what you can do, but I also want you to look at and say, okay, what can I do in real time? So here's a several things that you can put into action right now. And so if you see that there are some of these red flags, I want you to know, okay, you don't like hold up your hands and say, oh, what do I do? What do I do? You start to build. Relationship with them. You get down on their level, whether it's on the floor or on the couch, sit on the coffee table in this high chair at the table. You want that eye to eye contact, and you want to get involved in whatever they're doing. If they're playing with the. Legos or if they're playing with, trucks or dollies or Play-Doh or whatever it is, you want to get in their space and say What you're doing and who you are is important to me and I'm gonna join you. Right? The second thing, what you want to find time for is to separate yourself with him or her. Away from the busy traffic areas in your house. Find some one-on-one, quiet, clean, uncluttered space or time and really focus on each other. Again, and I've shared this before, that's what speech and language therapy is, right? Finding that that undivided attention one-on-one when you are the most important person in this world, and I'm in it with you because you matter. Number three would be to use your routines and repetitions. And I talk a lot about routines here, that they can begin to anchor and begin to join in and practice. Use songs like Row, row, row Your Boat, or Itsy Bitsy Spider. Or the wheels on the bus or any of those really simple concrete social play games that, that he can hear a thousand times and begin to join in with you. What all of these songs have in common. Not only the repetition, the slow speech, the, the, the sing songy kind of rhythm to it, but they have simple hand gestures and they're, they're fun, they're lighthearted. You can take turns, you can share jointly. All of these things are building that social connection, and that's the foundation out of any of us, no matter where they are on this continuum. Okay. Then the fourth thing that you can do is really and honestly reassess your screen time. And I've talked a lot about this, I'll have links to, I have, a miniseries, three parts of looking at what research is, or I'm sorry. Screen time is what it does to our kids, especially in those earth first, early three to five years, and we know there's a plethora of evidence to show us that one to two hours. before age three really is strongly linked to speech and language and social communication delays, right? It interferes with a human. Building of their connection, right? They're building of that social language verbally and non-verbally. And so I'll have that link down below if you want to go back and re-listen or, just simply look at what am I doing? What can I do better, And. If any of your children have some of these red flags or they seem to be falling off the track with their development, whether it's motor or sensory, inter sensory integration, speech and language, sleep, any of these developmental challenges, I would strongly urge all of you to stop. Screen times all together. And I know that's a big, big statement. I realize that it's very unpopular. Um, and, and you might even say, yeah, but that's the only break I get. Or He really loves X, y, Z show. I get it. But if you have a two or a three or a 4-year-old who is falling behind, or there are splinter skills, right? Which means he has some skills, but he has gaps in other skills, that means he's not developing in a timely fashion. And you might be dismissing it and say, yeah, he'll catch up, he'll be fine. Okay. That's your prerogative to choose that. But after 35 plus years and looking at kids with each decade, I mean, the smartphone didn't come into play until 2006, 2007. I know what child development was before they became a distraction. and I can assure you it is not helping, especially if your kid has any kind of developmental challenge. So the fifth thing that I would, really encourage you to do at any level is to keep them engaged, especially if you have a child who doesn't seem to want to be with other people. It's, and they just check out. They just do their own thing. And you might think, oh, that's great, that's social play, but is it play with purpose or is he really just disengaging with the other humans? Remember, an average, healthy, typical toddler should be obnoxious, should be noisy, should want to do whatever you're doing, should drive you crazy. Because you know, on the other side, when they're an older three and a four, they'll play by themselves. They'll build and create and engage with other kids beautifully. But those first three years, they're pretty obnoxious to you. Yeah, that's, that's who they're learning from. You're their first teacher. You're their first true play partner, keep in mind, you at this stage need to be the most interesting thing in the room. You need to be more interesting than their toys or the furniture, or the garbage truck, right? So talk, sing. Roll around chase dance. All of those playful interactions are building connection with each other and wiring their brain. You must be more interesting than anything else in the room. The toys, like I said, the widgets, the mirror, anything, your face, your voice, your eyes, your mouth, your body language, your silliness, they. Need to be intrigued with this adult figure. Mom, dad, grandparents, primary caretaker. And like I said, that's what we do in therapy, right? That I use the toys as a tool to, to play and engage to entice him. But I put it up to my face. I want him to look at me. I, you know, I might have Mr. Potato Head or a truck, or a bike or a. Monkey look monkey, and he's seeing my eyes, he's hearing my voice, and he's looking at the monkey and he's putting it all together. So even with little things like bubbles or blowing cotton balls off your hand or playing peekaboo, you know, touch body part games, right? Where are your toes? Where's your ear? Build their attention, build their ability to listen to your words and think, build their connection with you. Alright, so I know this is a lot, that's why I broke it up in parts one and two. That was the first pillar. And before we move on to the, to the next pillar, I, I just want. To give you this opportunity. If all of this is resonating with you and yet you're wondering how to actually go about it or apply some of these ideas in your day-to-day life, I want to invite you to join. With me, something that I call a tiny challenge. We think of one challenge. That you don't have to figure it out on your own. I'll help you take that first step. I'll help you stick with it and follow through and, but it's one challenge. One week, you and me get it done. If you're interested, there's more information in the show notes down below, and I look forward to answering any of your questions. Let's move on to pillar number two, and this is all about how to make. Sense of your child's language, how do they think and interpret and assign meaning to the words, that's what understanding, that's what receptive language means. How does the brain interpret what they hear or what it hears? Right? And you're looking at all of the experiences around them. And so in my industry, we really do look at. How that the brain is this coding machine, right? It, it's coding the structure. Like I said earlier, the speech is the physical part of, of talking or of human communication. So it's mapping out the sounds and coding the order of how sounds go. But at the same time, there is attaching meaning to, to clusters of of sounds that create words and create meaning. Right. If I say potato head, they know what that means. If I say Monster truck, they know what that means. If I say. Bath time, they know what that means. Or grandma's coming, they know what that means. They don't have to understand each and every sound. They've, they've had enough coding in their 12, 16, 18, 30 months of life that they. Know how to process that auditorily in their brain, And so understand really, or understanding really begins with simple concepts. And in the very early stages at 6, 8, 10 months, the first thing is what we call object permanence. Knowing that something exists even when it's not in sight. And in the beginning, kids don't really understand that, but once they realize that that object, people things are permanent, even if it's in the other room, then they're realizing how to interface with this world cognitively. And then they, we really begin to build this whole cause and effect, realizing that they can make things happen good and bad, right? If I push this button, the door opens. If I dump this glass, the water goes out all on the floor and mom freaks out. if I, throw dad's shoe off the porch, he gets mad. All these kinds of cause and effect some with small manipulative objects, others with people, and then there's the level of what we call basic problem solving. So early, early on they're figuring out, you know, I'd say close to mm, it starts to emerge around four months, but really six and eight months. But that's when they're starting to reach. And they're figuring out like, oh, this hand is kind of attached to me and I can reach and grab something and hold it and bring it to my mouth. And that's when they realize that they can move their body, they can roll. Right. They can push up to a crawling position. They can pull up on the chair. They realize that they can put things together, maybe two blocks, or they can put blocks or objects in a box and then dump it out. That's a problem solving skill. Putting things inside one another because they fit different sizes, different shapes. They're not really. Being tested with the language component, but that's why they're always trying to do stuff because they're, they're wiring their problems, their problem solving network, right? They're snapping things and shutting things and opening things and pulling things and messing things up. They don't know it's a mess. They don't know that you shouldn't touch that, but they're curious and you wanna see a lot of that going on. And that's why they get into everything. That's why they're literally under your feet and they're driving you crazy. These may seem small and obnoxious for most of us, but they're huge cognitive milestones and they're incredibly important, and I think. Sometimes we're always looking for the big milestone markers such as, you know, walking and talking and riding a bike. But these building blocks, especially in these first 24 months of. Cognition is how they're thinking and processing, and understand how this world is working. It's not intelligence, per se, and I, I've said that a lot here because we now know that intelligence isn't fixed and is based on your life experience and your opportunities to interface physically. Cognitively, emotionally, spiritually, with this world that expands your understanding, expands your thinking and reasoning, and none of that is fixed. So for this category, want you to have this big takeaway that your child must understand words, single words, short phrases before. They're ready to use them, and that gets really lost in the shuffle quite often with, daycare and preschool people, speech pathologists. Ourselves, especially pediatricians. How many words do they have? Right? But it's really like, are they connecting? Are they playing, are they curious? And, and building things and trying to put things together. So let's, let me give you a list of things that you can watch out for by 12 months. Your child, your toddler, and we call them toddlers because they're starting to tt, right? Um, they turn to his name. Right. And like I said, give him a couple tries, especially if he's engrossed in something, they understand your facial expressions and your different tones, whether you're being playful, whether you're, you're, you're worried and say, stop, you know, don't touch that. That's, that could be dangerous. Um, but they, they're able to differentiate. They follow your gestures. Like if you're pointing at something, right? It's not just pointing though, it's like saying, sh if you have the baby, shh, and they can lower the voice. Or they, they try to imitate you. Or if you say, bye-bye, bye-bye. Or if you blow a kiss. Bye. Do they follow that gestures? Do they know what that is? And I, and I've shared this before, like little kids who are done with their session with me, they just say, bye-bye, lady. Like they're telling me, stop talking. Right? But you also want them to begin to imitate these gestures as well as like if you pat the baby, oh, nice baby. Or if you pretend to drink from a cup and give it to them. They'll try it too. If you rock the dolly, will they rock? All of these are really, really big milestones and imitation is one that gets lost in the shuffle over and over again. You also want to look at your 12 month old. Can they follow simple one step directions or directives? If say you have a cow and a truck and you say, oh, can I have the cow give mommy the cow? Or if daddy's over there, give daddy the truck. He might not wanna give up the truck, but simple directions. Or if you're getting dressed and you say, oh, wear your shoes. Find your shoes. You also want your 12 month old to point to at least three body parts. Usually the big ones, right? The tummy, maybe the head, the nose, the hand, big foot. Right? You want them to be able to compartmentalize or no, that's not correct. It's, it's really segmenting. Your, your words and matching it to something that he has interfaced with, you know, a thousands times, right? Getting changed and bathed and getting ready for bed and put your, your arm in the coat and, and all of these kinds of things. And so they're, they've attached enough single words to their body parts and they can start to identify them. On command. And then you want a 12 month old to really attend to a book for, for two or three minutes. And many, many, many kids with a lot of good routines and structures can, can really focus on a book for five or 10 minutes to, if it's one of their favorites. And they really, they don't just take the book and look at it themselves. They really share it with you, and that's a big difference. Again, it's social connection. It's social communication. And then you also want your 12 month old to really like those songs and those nursery rhymes to, they enjoy being with you, like I said, and by 1824 months, they should be able to follow more complex directions. Not not big elaborate, but up to two steps, you know? Uh, get your shoes and meet me by the front door. They could do that or wash your hands and get the napkins. They could do that, right? But they could also point to objects in people when named, whether it's in a picture or in the room. You know, you could play the I spy game, right? I spy a big red book. Who could have a big red book on the table, I spy a yellow cup, those kinds of things, but you really want them to be able to listen to your spoken language, one or two words, and be able to identify it within the room. and then also they can point to things in a book, nouns and verbs. You know, again, you don't want really busy, busy pictures, but if you have a simple picture of kids at the playground say, oh, show me the girl who is swinging. Who's swinging. Or Where's the apple tree? Or, show me the pig who's in the mud? Right. The pig mud concepts that they have heard over and over again that they've related to in this book and that they're interested in sharing with you. That's the key, right? And then that 18 to 24 month begin using new words regularly. And not just the same words over and over again. And this is the big thing where, and I, and I have a handout and, and I'll have the link it's moving from single words to two word phrases, but in there I have a, a sheet, which includes all of the, the primary first words that you could kind of target. And then that's a good stepping stone and keep a list going. And I have many, many, many families over the years that felt like, oh, they don't really have a lot of words. And then they start writing them down and realize, wow, they really do have a hundred words. Right? Or I'm focusing on building his nouns and his verbs. Because I know there's this language explosion between 24 months and 30 months, right? On average, they acquire 10 new words a day, So. You really want to be able to, to identify things in the the everyday life, right? In the books that are important to him, in his toys, on his person, in his interactions with his family, all of these kinds of things that you can build their vocabulary quickly and easily if you spend time focused on him and pulling him in. To the language and to the gestures. So if a child is mostly speaking unintelligible jargon, what we call an unintelligible jargon, so they're saying a lot of sounds, but it's not connecting, um, or sequenced in real words by age two, that typically is more than just a late talker. Typically, not always, but. Sometimes there's, a month or two that they're just lagging behind or they're talking a lot, but they just haven't organized it in their head yet. but I think. Sometimes there's a motor disc coordination, and it doesn't mean that there's, a DD or, really dyspraxia or any of these things. It just means maybe they haven't had enough practice in developing and, by adding some one-on-one time, they could. Hone those skills a little bit better. but I, I, I want you to think about speech clarity, right? Intelligibility is a physical motor planning thing, and sometimes it's a sequencing issue, meaning that they just haven't strung enough words together and they need more practice with that. But here are some ways that you can strengthen your toddler's understanding. Because these are the building blocks before they really start talking independently, clearly, and with confidence, right? So you can simplify your language. Use single words and short phrases, especially when it's a one-to-one when you're changing them or getting them in the car, or going grocery shopping. If it's a family affair or you're out socially, then he's gonna get that, that rich whole language. But, but make sure that you have plenty of opportunity to really concentrate on, on the basic building blocks of how words How words are structured, and then you can demonstrate function with the language too. So you want to expand not just the nouns, right? But you can use language when you're doing stuff, when you're washing your hands, oh, turn on the faucet, get some soap. Wash, wash, wash, rinse. Under the faucet. You're giving them a lot of language vocabulary or, I'm sorry, nouns, verbs, propositions, and, and then you can do things, simple things like, oh, let's peel the banana. Let's pull one of the peel two of the peel, and what are you gonna do next? You know, so you're really talking, not just labeling things, but you're putting it in context, in function and mixing up the language, the structure. So we, we don't want kids just naming stuff that's kind of just rote memory. We want them to use it functionally. And I talk a lot about, shopping and sorting laundry and putting groceries away every day, activities that you can pull them in. and research really shows that children need about 2000 words a day, or I'm sorry, 2000 words an hour. An hour. So if they're awake 10 hours a day and they get 2000 words, that's 2000 times 10, right? That's that's their 20,000 words during their waking hour, right? And it needs to be positive. Relatable, connecting to what you're doing, making it purposeful because that's where real learning comes play in play. And so that's why I always argue when they say, oh, you know, she, they love whatever x, y, Z show and they can sing this song or they, they've learned five new words, but it's not really deep learning. It's just memorized. And yes, you and I sing a lot of nursery rhymes and get them to sing along, right? Row, row, row your boat or something. But he has human connection with it. He's building his relationship with me. That's a lot different than looking at a flat screen. So you want to give them a reason to listen, Point to pictures and ask questions. Demonstrate things like. Hmm. Where's the cow? Where do cows live? Where do they sleep at night? And then you show them, oh look, he's in the barn. That's where cows sleep in the barn. Do you sleep in a barn? No. Where do you sleep? In a bed. So you're using language functionally and having a dialogue with him, and he's listening. Right. You're teaching them through play. You're being silly. You're being present, present, right? You exaggerate things. You ask them silly questions. Do you sleep in the barn? Right. They're gonna be more engaged. If you're interesting, remember what I said in the beginning, you have to be more interesting than the toys or the fire truck, or you know, climbing under the bed, whatever, right? Because you want the brain to be soaking up this language. They have to build. From the bottom up, this, this attention and engagement and attachment with you. And then they're coding the language and they're putting these, these word structures, a whole bunch of sounds strung together. Oh, that means basket, that means race car, that means baby doll. And they're attaching it to the objects, to the noun, and then to the verbs or the function. What do you do with a baby doll? Oh. I feed the baby doll. I race the race car, I crush it, whatever it is, right? But their brain is soaking up all of this environmental coding. So I want you to always remember, don't assume that your child is just being defiant, right? Sometimes they're not just ignoring you. Sometimes they, they just don't understand yet and they don't know how to respond. And that's why we take playful interaction and make it engageable where you and I then can measure how well do they really understand, how well do they follow simple directions if you're expecting them to follow directions, when you're trying to get out the door. And they're, they're ignoring you or they're running away, or whatever. They're resisting. Then you need to really measure how well do they understand? Can they do it in a non-threatening, playful, fun, one-to-one setting? You know, if we're playing with Mr. Potato hat or your building. Whatever with, magnet blocks or, or farm set or a zoo or whatever the deal is, right? You measure it in this play-based scenario and then you know, when he ignores you, when you're trying to go out the door, he's doing that on purpose. Right. Okay. So if today's episode is resonating with you, or if you've had a few aha moments, please share with another mom or a grandmother or a caretaker that you know in your inner circle, because we all know the more we understand and the more we identify strengths and weaknesses, the better we can support all of our children from early on, from from the start. and if you're ready for personalized support, don't forget to check out my tiny challenge. It's that one-on-one opportunity to work directly with me, get tailored help for your child's development, your specific struggle that you're not sure how to deal with, right? The link is in the show notes and you can learn more. I will see you in the next episode for part two and remember. You are your child's first teacher. They need one-on-one time with you, so let's build a strong foundation together and I really, really appreciate as always your precious time. God bless, and I'll see you in the next one. I.